Anonymous Answers


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tbfalex:
Dear Anonymous who wants to keep his faith strong while in college.

First of all, thank you for reaching out to us with your question. Secondly, I would like to say that you have been put in an amazing place to minister to those around you. However, you will need to learn how to run from sin, otherwise you will fall into it.

Now in order to move forward I need to make this clear. The Bible is the Word of God and it is 100% true and reliable. Therefore, in order to help you out, I will be using scripture that I feel the Lord is telling me to use to help you through this time. However, please also be examining your life. From the sounds of it, you have surrendered your life to Jesus Christ already, and that's awesome!! But since I don't know you or know what you have been doing lately, please examine your faith as I share with you what the Bible says. I will be putting many Bible verses in parentheses so please look them up as you are reading through this!  Also, you have to realize that Satan is real and he came to steal, to kill, and to destroy your life. (John 10:10) He wants you to fall into sin, he wants you to feel shame and guilt for what you have done, and he wants to make you compromise your conscience so that your faith will also be shipwrecked (1 Timothy 1:19).

I get the reference to run from sin in 2 Timothy 2:22 "Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts."
Let's focus on the first sentence of that verse. I will tell you that as a young man (I'm assuming you are around 18-22 years old) there are a lot of 'youthful lusts' out there, especially in the college setting. These youthful lusts can be sex, partying, bad language, pornography, drugs, alcohol, masterbation, cruel/course jokes, gossip, etc. All of those sins are everywhere in our culture, but the Word of God says to run, literally run, from those things! Don't be apart of those things! I'm sure that at football practice is one of the worst times for you, as I'm sure many of your teammates cuss, make everything that's said sound sexualized, and I'm also sure that if you don't participate in those things than you probably aren't very popular amongst everyone. However, in Galatians 5:19 it says, "When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures,.....,drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God." That's a hard verse for many people because they see themselves in there in many places. I would like you to read through that whole verse and examine yourself for a second. Are you falling into some of those sins? The Good News for you is that Jesus Christ is the answer. (Read Romans 7:14-25) through Jesus Christ we can be forgiven from our sins if we turn from our sins (repent) and turn to God (surrender to the Lordship of Jesus over our lives) (Acts 3:19). You see, that's why I'm excited for you man! You are in a place where you can share The Answer with all of your team mates who are lost and have no hope! It may be hard to do, but I believe that God put you there for the opportunity to share your faith with everyone who doesn't know Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior! 

The second part of 2 Timothy 2:22 talks about having companionship with other Christians. I know you said that no one believes what you do, but I know that there is, you just aren't looking in the right places. You need to get connected with a church in your area. Find a solid, Bible preaching church and find an adult who loves Jesus and tell him about what you are going through. Build a relationship so that he can keep you accountable and ask you the tough questions about what is going on in your life.

Finally, you NEED to be reading your Bible every day! I've heard it said that the Bible acts as a filter from the world and the devil. The world tells you that sin is fun and it leads to joy and happiness. However, when you get the Truth into your life (the Bible) you will filter out those lies right away and be able to counteract them with the Truth that sin is NOT worth it! It kills your relationship with Jesus, and it leaves you feeling emptier and emptier every single time! 

Lastly, I want to leave you with this. Ephesians 5:1-20. PLEASE read this section of scripture and take a large amount of time to meditate on it and pray to God and ask him to give you the strength to resist the temptations . 

It's been my pleasure to write this back to you and I hope and pray that it helps and that you take what I said serious. Please, examine yourself, get connected in a solid church and take that step of boldness to reach out to an older man who loves the Lord and will be able to mentor you, be in prayer, and be in the Bible EVERYDAY! A few more verses I wish I had time to explain to you, but I want you to look them up on your own. 2 Peter 1:3, Ephesians 2:1-10, Colossians 3:1-10, and one of my personal favorites 1 Corinthians 10:13. 

I hope and pray that this helps. If you have anymore questions or would like to talk please email me directly at alex@toddbecker.org
 


09/23/2017
tbfaaron:
To anonymous addicted to pornography:

First I want to commend you for your honesty. Man, pornography is such a real battle and it's definitely not an easy one. You are on the right track though in admitting it and seeking help. 

You said "How can I be so close to God and yet still cannot overcome this disgusting habit?"

I really want to address this because its a tough statement. 

It sounds like you have a basic (at least) grasp of the Gospel, but I will touch on it briefly just in case. Our sin, for example like pornography, lust, sexual immorality (Galatians 5:19-21, Matthew 5:27-30) has condemned us to Hell. We have no way to work ourselves out of God's anger at our sin on our own. Because God knew that we didn't have the power on our own to turn away from sin and because He loves us so much, He sent Jesus to pay the price that we could not and will never be able to pay for our sins. Romans 6:23 says that "the wages" - (what we've earned) of our sin is death - a spiritual death meaning separation from God which is Hell. The verse goes on and says that "but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord." We have a gift that has been given to us and if we choose to receive it, by putting our faith and trust in Jesus Christ and if we make Him the Lord - the ruler, boss, in control - of our life, the Bible promises eternal life with Jesus in Heaven. 

Because of the fact that you mentioned that you are close to God, in my answer, I will assume that you have done this and put your faith and trust in Jesus. 

In Romans 8 verse 5 the Bible says "Those who are dominated by the sinful nature (our natural tendencies to disobey God) think about sinful things, but those who are controlled by the Holy Spirit think about things that please the Spirit." 

It sounds like your life right now is dominated by pornography and that your mind is probably filled with the thoughts, temptations and lusts of pornography. The verse says, though, that when you are controlled by the Spirit of God, you are going to think about things that are pleasing to God. How do you become controlled by the Spirit? If we skip down to verse 9, it says "...You are controlled by the Spirit if you have the Spirit of God living in you." 

When you trusted in Christ, you didn't only trust Him for salvation, you trusted Him to give you the power to do what pleases Him and Philippians 2:12, 13 says, "...Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him."

If you were on a flight and the pilot told you that at any time you would be jumping out of the plane because the engines had failed and you were going to crash, you wouldn't just set the parachute in your lap and hope that it saved you, would you? OF COURSE NOT! You would strap that thing on as quickly and tightly as you could not even worrying about if it was "comfortable" or not, because you KNOW that the parachute would save your life. 

The same should be true with Jesus. Because of our sin, our plane is going to crash. It might sound cheesy, but in this scenario, Jesus is our parachute. With Him, we will live, without Him, we will surely die. So we need to take Him very seriously.

Pornography is a very tough battle.

God knows it's tough and so he tells us - "Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. " - 1 Cor 6:18. Sexual sin is the only sin that God tells us to run from!

He takes it very seriously too - "You have heard the commandment that says, 'You must not commit adultery.' But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So if your eye-even your good eye-causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell." - Matthew 5:27-29

When you read these verses together, God is very clear that sexual immorality and lust (pornography) is not to be messed with. We are to be Holy as God is Holy. 

So in summary, I will say this: We are told in the Bible to run from things like pornography, yet we keep access directly to it in our pockets everyday. Jesus said to gouge out your eye if it causes you to sin, yet we are unwilling to change the way we live our life, because we want to have access to our social media. Could it be that if we really wanted to change we would seriously consider things like a 'dumb phone' or at the very least, accountabilty software? 

We cannot be close to God AND be controlled by sin. 

I encourage you to read Romans 6:12-18 and 1 John 3:7-10 on your own. They are very strong verses but as a believer they can be very encouraging and motivating. 

I know that I gave you a lot to think about and hopefully it makes sense. If you have any questions or want to continue this discussion, please feel free to email me at aaron@toddbecker.org
 


09/23/2017
Anonymous:

I am addicted to porn. I don't know why because deep down I know what is going on is wrong and it is desensitizing me, but I just can't stop. What should I do? How can I want to be so close to God and yet still cannot overcome this disgusting habit?

09/22/2017
Anonymous:

I am addicted to porn. I don't know why because deep down I know what is going on is wrong and it is desensitizing me, but I just can't stop. What should I do? How can I want to be so close to God and yet still cannot overcome this disgusting habit?

09/22/2017
tbfalex:
Dear Anonymous who wants to keep his faith strong while in college.

First of all, thank you for reaching out to us with your question. Secondly, I would like to say that you have been put in an amazing place to minister to those around you. However, you will need to learn how to run from sin, otherwise you will fall into it.

Now in order to move forward I need to make this clear. The Bible is the Word of God and it is 100% true and reliable. Therefore, in order to help you out, I will be using scripture that I feel the Lord is telling me to use to help you through this time. However, please also be examining your life. From the sounds of it, you have surrendered your life to Jesus Christ already, and that's awesome!! But since I don't know you or know what you have been doing lately, please examine your faith as I share with you what the Bible says. I will be putting many Bible verses in parentheses so please look them up as you are reading through this!  Also, you have to realize that Satan is real and he came to steal, to kill, and to destroy your life. (John 10:10) He wants you to fall into sin, he wants you to feel shame and guilt for what you have done, and he wants to make you compromise your conscience so that your faith will also be shipwrecked (1 Timothy 1:19).

I get the reference to run from sin in 2 Timothy 2:22 "Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts."
Let's focus on the first sentence of that verse. I will tell you that as a young man (I'm assuming you are around 18-22 years old) there are a lot of 'youthful lusts' out there, especially in the college setting. These youthful lusts can be sex, partying, bad language, pornography, drugs, alcohol, masterbation, cruel/course jokes, gossip, etc. All of those sins are everywhere in our culture, but the Word of God says to run, literally run, from those things! Don't be apart of those things! I'm sure that at football practice is one of the worst times for you, as I'm sure many of your teammates cuss, make everything that's said sound sexualized, and I'm also sure that if you don't participate in those things than you probably aren't very popular amongst everyone. However, in Galatians 5:19 it says, "When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures,.....,drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God." That's a hard verse for many people because they see themselves in there in many places. I would like you to read through that whole verse and examine yourself for a second. Are you falling into some of those sins? The Good News for you is that Jesus Christ is the answer. (Read Romans 7:14-25) through Jesus Christ we can be forgiven from our sins if we turn from our sins (repent) and turn to God (surrender to the Lordship of Jesus over our lives) (Acts 3:19). You see, that's why I'm excited for you man! You are in a place where you can share The Answer with all of your team mates who are lost and have no hope! It may be hard to do, but I believe that God put you there for the opportunity to share your faith with everyone who doesn't know Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior! 

The second part of 2 Timothy 2:22 talks about having companionship with other Christians. I know you said that no one believes what you do, but I know that there is, you just aren't looking in the right places. You need to get connected with a church in your area. Find a solid, Bible preaching church and find an adult who loves Jesus and tell him about what you are going through. Build a relationship so that he can keep you accountable and ask you the tough questions about what is going on in your life.

Finally, you NEED to be reading your Bible every day! I've heard it said that the Bible acts as a filter from the world and the devil. The world tells you that sin is fun and it leads to joy and happiness. However, when you get the Truth into your life (the Bible) you will filter out those lies right away and be able to counteract them with the Truth that sin is NOT worth it! It kills your relationship with Jesus, and it leaves you feeling emptier and emptier every single time! 

Lastly, I want to leave you with this. Ephesians 5:1-20. PLEASE read this section of scripture and take a large amount of time to meditate on it and pray to God and ask him to give you the strength to resist the temptations . 

It's been my pleasure to write this back to you and I hope and pray that it helps and that you take what I said serious. Please, examine yourself, get connected in a solid church and take that step of boldness to reach out to an older man who loves the Lord and will be able to mentor you, be in prayer, and be in the Bible EVERYDAY! A few more verses I wish I had time to explain to you, but I want you to look them up on your own. 2 Peter 1:3, Ephesians 2:1-10, Colossians 3:1-10, and one of my personal favorites 1 Corinthians 10:13. 

I hope and pray that this helps. If you have anymore questions or would like to talk please email me directly at alex@toddbecker.org
 


09/19/2017
Anonymous:

How can I keep my faith strong while in college?  I am on a college football team, and alcohol and drugs are everywhere.  No one has the same beliefs as I do, and I do not want to fall into what this world offers.  How do I stand strong, knowing that I am alone in what I believe?

09/19/2017
tbfbecca:
To Anonymous asking if you can lose your salvation.
 
First of all, take heart and be encouraged, because I can tell that God is at work in your life right now! He is calling you back to Him.
 
In answer to your question: can you lose your salvation? No, you can not "lose" it…God promises that He will never leave us or forsake us. But you CAN walk away from God.  So, you can not lose your salvation, like it was taken away from you, but you can choose to walk away from Jesus.  You can walk away from Jesus by choosing sin over Him.
 
You asked a question: will God keep pursuing me?  God is definitely pursuing you right now! I feel it in your statements that you miss Jesus, that your heart years for Him. God is in hot pursuit of you! But, as Genesis 6:3 says: "Then the LORD said, "My Spirit will not contend (put up) with humans forever." At any moment, you could be called up to stand before God, and if you haven't repented, you would be standing before God, not in right standing spiritually before Him. That is a very dangerous position to be in. Luke 13:3 says: "But unless you repent, you too will all perish."  Don't ask: how long will God pursue me? Because then it will make you think that you can keep sinning until YOU decide to turn back to God. Romans 1:24 says: "So God abandoned them to do whatever shameful things their hearts desired."
 Instead, thank God that He is pursuing you right now, and turn to Him while there is still time! You never know when your last moment on earth will be.  He is reaching out to you with His grace right now.
 
The devil is a liar. Sin seems so good and pleasant at the beginning, and then it makes you miserable and leaves you all alone. God has promised Life, and Life more abundantly. John 10:10 says: "The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly."  The devil tells you that sin will be more enjoyable than living for Christ, and then in the end, you find yourself devastated, fellowship with God severed and your close Christian relationships broken. You can't trust the devil. He takes very bad care of the people that choose to sin. But you can trust the Lord! He takes the best care of His people that choose to turn from their sin and repent.  Being in direct rebellion to God is a very dangerous place to be. You're never safe in sin. But standing forgiven before God is the safest place!
 
In closing, you know what you need to do. You know the next step. It will be hard, but you will never experience fullness of life and joy and peace again until you turn 100% from your sin and choose to follow Jesus with ever fiber of your being. He is waiting to restore you and forgive you. You just have to take the step to repent fully and turn all the way back to Him. Repentance means turning 180 degrees from the direction that you were heading. You know that God is calling to you. He is pursuing you! Don't expect Him to strive with your sin forever…turn to Him now while there is still time! You never know when it will be too late, and you will be standing before the throne of God with unrepented sin in your life.
 
My heart goes out to you! I want you to know that God wants to forgive you and restore you to relationship with Him! I would love to talk with you more about this, or anything that you are struggling with. I truly mean that. Please feel free to email me anytime at becca@toddbecker.org


09/09/2017
Anonymous:

Can you loose your salvation? The Bible talks about how people are changed as they step out of the darkness and put on Christ and walk in the light. Theoretically, what if, I was saved and I walked with Christ daily. I know for a fact the Holy Spirit dwelt inside me. But then I struggled with a sin, and I gave up fighting. my heart yearns for Jesus. I miss him. I miss the peace and joy that we're fruits of my relationship with him. Does this mean I'm no longer saved. Will God turn his back on me. Or will he continue to Persue me till I turn to Him again? Also, I would prefer Becca or keith to answer. 

09/09/2017
tbfbecca:
To Anonymous who feels bad about herself.

I typically wouldn't be awake at 3AM to answer a post, but I think God wanted me to wake up so I could see that you posted.

You mentioned that you didn't know why God kept protecting you. I know why. It's because He has a big plan for your life.  But He also has given you free will. You must stop trying to harm yourself before you truly miss out on an amazing future.

You mentioned you felt awful after the evening event. That is not a feeling that you are getting because anyone thinks you are an awful person. That is the Holy Spirit at work in your life...helping you realize the deep need that you have for Jesus' cleansing blood to come and wash over you.

There is absolutely NOTHING that you have done that is too hard for God to forgive.  My very favorite verse in the whole Bible is 2 Corinthians 5:17: "And this means that anyone who belongs to Christ, has become a NEW CREATION; the old has passed away and a new life has begun."
Jesus wants you to make a choice today...Will you choose to belong to Christ? Belonging to Christ is a lot more than just saying that you grew up Christian. Belonging to Christ is choosing to follow Him every day with your whole life. I encourage you to get alone right now, tell Jesus everything you told me. If you truly want to be made new, and feel JOY and CLEAN again, ask Him to forgive you, ask Him to be Lord of your life. Choose to leave your sin behind and follow Jesus.

Joel 2:13 says:
Return to the Lord your God,
    for he is merciful and compassionate,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
    He is eager to relent and not punish.

Zechariah 1:3 says:
This is what the Lord Almighty says: ‘Returnto me,’ declares the Lord Almighty, ‘and I will return to you,’ says theLord Almighty.

First, It's important (just like you have told me) that you realize that you need help...that you are a sinner. We are all sinners. We have all failed time after time. We all desperately need a Savior. 
1 John 1:9-10 says:
 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sinsand purify us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us.

Second, you must believe in Jesus.  
Mark 1:15 says:
"Repent and believe the good news!”

Mark 9:23 says:
“Everything is possible for one who believes.”
When you admit that you're a sinner, believe in Jesus..believe that He can wash away your sins, the Bible says that everything is possible...that means that no matter how far you have fallen away from God, you are not too far gone! Jesus is waiting for you to run to Him! He will wash you clean.

Thirdly, you must confess. This means you ask Jesus to forgive you of all of your sins. Tell Him that you need and want a Savior. Ask Him to help you live for HIm and not for yourself...that means choose to follow Him and what He says in His Word, the Bible, and not just live to make your own self happy. Because the funny thing is, when we live to make our own self happy, we become the most miserable person on earth. But when we truly live for Jesus, choosing to follow Him, He will fill you with joy. This does not mean that life won't be hard, or that you will have really bad days. This means that no matter what happens in your life, that you will be ok because you have the Lord Jesus living inside of you, and He will give you strength for whatever you come across in life.

So, I challenge you right now. Choose Jesus. Ask Him to forgive you! He will! Ask HIm to make you a new creation. He will! Choose to turn your life around, and ask Him for His help in walking down His path.

I want to give you a sample prayer that you can pray:
Jesus, I come to you full of sadness, brokenness, shame and frustration. I need a Savior. I need help. I know that You are the Only One Who can forgive me and make me new. Please forgive me of my sins. (Name the ones you can think of) Please wash me clean. I want to follow you. I believe that You died to take away my sins. I choose to follow You today. I choose to not just say that I'm a Christian. Please help me to truly live like a Christian. I want to be a Christ-follower. Thank you for forgiving me and making me new. Help me to fall in love with You, Jesus.
In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Lastly, I want to challenge you to talk to a trusted Christian adult. Maybe it's a pastor, a youth pastor, a trusted person in your church, a Christian teacher, your mom.  Tell them about the decision you made to follow Christ. Ask them to help hold you accountable as you choose to follow Jesus. Tell them they can ask you the hard questions like: Are you following Jesus in your decisions? Are you learning more about Jesus by talking to Him every day and reading your Bible?

And please order a free "I Know" book off this website! It will explain things so much better than I can in  a short post, and it will help you on your journey to follow Christ.

As you choose to follow Jesus each day, it's so important to get refueld...if I never eat any food I will die. It's the same way with our walk with Christ. If we never pray or read our Bible, we will shrivel up and and die in our walks with God. Start reading in the book of John in your Bible. When you order an "I Know" book, you will also get a Bible in the same package. Also, talk to Jesus. Tell Him what you are going through..ask for His help! He loves you! He cares about you! He wants to hear from you!

Most importantly, I want you to know that you can email me anytime. I will try to respond quickly to you. My email is becca@toddbecker.org

 


09/07/2017
Anonymous:

Hi I was at the event tonight in Torrington. Now I feel really bad about myself. After the event I tried killing myself. I have done some bad things in my life. I have been raised as a Christian. I grew up in the church. How can I forgive myself for the bad choices that I have made. Why am I still hear not really bad has happened to me from my bad choices. I am confused as to why God keeps protecting me. I am so lost. I want to be happy again. I have tried to kill myself before. I am just so tired of it all. I have not been happy with myself for a long time. How do I became happy with myself and get over my the mistakes that I have made. I have felt so ashamed of myself. See I have tacking a lot of nighty pictures of myself. Then I send them to guys. I have also gone to lots of partys. I have also smoked pot. I think that my mother has lost trust in me. She doesn't even know everything I have done. So how do I forgive myself and gane my mother's trust again.

09/07/2017
tbfkendra:
To anonymous who feels empty: Thanks for reaching out. It is common that you would feel that way, because everything in this world leaves us feeling empty and without purpose. The only One who can fill that void is Jesus Christ! The Bible says in Matthew 4:4-People do not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God. We can't live off of physical things on this Earth to satisfy us. Our fulfillment comes from our relationship with Jesus Christ. When we are chasing after other things to fill that void it is called idolatry. Idolatry is worshipping anything when we should be worshipping God. For example, it could be a boyfriend or girlfriend, money, sports, etc. Revelation 21:8 says, "But cowards, unbelievers, the corrupt, murderers, the immoral, those who practice witchcraft, IDOL WORSHIPERS, and all liars-their fate is in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death. What it is saying here is that those who worship anything but God to fill the void in their life are going to hell! That is a scary place to be. I would encourage you to consider if that is you? Are you trying to fill that void with things besides God? Are you headed to hell? There is hope! Jesus came to die on the cross for our sins. He died for your idol worshipping. He loves You. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:21-For God made Christ, who never sinned, to be the offering for our sin, so that we could be made right with God through Christ. Jesus loves you so much that even though he never did anything wrong, he took your punishment you deserved of going to hell by dying for your sins. He loves you and wants a relationship with you! It is your choice if you make that comittment to follow Jesus. You can make that comittment by telling Jesus you accept His love for you. Tell Him You are sorry for your sins and that you want Jesus to be in charge of your life. The only way it will change you is if you really mean it! Romans 10:9-10 "If you openly declare that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by openly declaring your faith that you are saved. I hope you choose to make that comittment to Christ! I will be praying for you! If you have any more questions please email me Kendra@toddbecker.org

09/06/2017
Anonymous:

Would if I feel nothing anymore. Like I don't care anymore about anything. 

09/06/2017
tbfmatt:
To anonymous with a depressed friend. 

First off I want to say thats very admirable of you to want to help your friend. We need people to step in and help when they see people hurting! 

I think the best thing you could do is show her how much she matters in the eyes of God. you could show her in scripture such as Luke 12:6-7 “What is the price of five sparrows—two copper coins? Yet God does not forget a single one of them.  And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows." I love this verse because it shows that God pays attention to every little detail in the universe even a little sparrow, and He knows what you are going through, and he knows what your friend is going through. the great thing is God did something about hurt and pain and suffering that comes with living. He sent Jesus His only son to this world to clean up the worlds problems ,the biggest problem being sin.

Sin is a word that describes every bad thing you have ever done. Every time you disobeyed your parents, every time you cheated on a test and everytime you were rude to a classmate you were commiting what the bible calls sin. Sin will seperate you from God and His kingdom which im sure you have heard of before is called heaven. that means if you have ever sinned before you cannot go to heaven. God looks at you as someone who is unclean someone who cant come into heaven. Romans 3:23 says, "For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard." 

The great news  for you and your friend is that God sent Jesus His only son to earth.  He lived a perfect life. Jesus never sinned..ever!  in the bible 1 peter 2:22 says, "He never sinned, or ever lied to anyone." Because he was perfect God sent him to die for us on the cross so that he could pay God for all of our sins and all of the Worlds sins. 

You and your friend need to realize that God loved you so much and cared about you so much that he sent his Son to take your place. you shouldve been killed on that cross but instead Jesus took that punishment so that you could have a 2nd chance at life in heaven with God. 

what you need to do is believe that Jesus is the Son of God and stop doing the stuff in your life you know is sin. Instead of doing those things ask Jesus for the power to live a life that God wants you to live. 

if you have any questions email me 

matt@toddbecker.org

 


08/25/2017
Anonymous:

How can i help my exgirlfriend because she is dealing with server deppresion

08/24/2017
tbftodd:
To Anonymous who feels like their life is ripping apart at the seams:  

Boy, I really feel for you.  I know that feeling quite well, and feeling alone and lost is one of the worst feelings a person can feel.  But there is Good News!  Your Father in Heaven loves you more than you could ever possibly imagine.  

I don't know if you know Jesus, but He is God who came to earth to make a way for you to come to God and know His love.  He lived a perfect life, fullfilling all the laws that could keep us from God, and then He died on the cross as a sacrifice for our sins, so that He could make us blameless before God.  Then three days after His horrible death, He rose from the grave, and showed Himself to many people at once to prove His power over death and give us hope for life after death.  God did all this because He wants a relationship with you!  

Think about that:  The Creator of all things in the universe (Genesis 1:1), who holds all things together in His hands (Colossians 1:17), loves you so much that He came to earth, lived as a man, and came so that we would know the truth (John 1:1-14).  Then He died for our sins so that we could have eternal life with Him (John 3:16).  He did all that because He loves you!  Not just all people in general--He loves YOU! He knows the number of hairs on your head (Luke 12:7), He knows your life and has a plan for you (Jeremiah 29:11) and He cares for you personally and wants you to never worry (Matthew 6:25-34).

So how does all this help you?  Well, I believe that if you can really and truly accept that God loves you enough to sacrifice Himself for you, then you must also know that he will never leave you alone(Deuteronomy 31:6).  If the Creator is for you, who can hurt you? (Romans 8:31).  Even though there will be hard times here on earth, we have the assurance that Jesus stands with us, and what He holds is so much more than what the world can give (John 16:33)!  

Now, armed with this knoweldge, what do you do?  Well, specifically without knowing exactly what you are facing, I can't even begin to tell you what to do.  But if you have never acknowledged your own sin and turned to Jesus as your Lord and Savior, now is the time.  Simply pray something like this: "Lord Jesus, I know that I am a sinner, and I can never be good enough to earn Your love.  But I know that You alone can take away my sin, and You alone paid for my sin so that I can stand with you.  I want the life the you give freely.  Please clean my heart, refresh my soul, and make me Yours."  

I will not promise that your life will change immediately and that everything will be perfect.  It most certainly will not.  What will change is that you will know that you have hope for your future--the knowledge that no matter how hard things are, you are no longer alone--the Father, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit, all stand with you to hold you.  You are also now part of God's family on earth, so I STRONGLY recommend that you find a good Bible-teaching church and find a mentor, someone you can trust (a pastor, elder, or trusted friend) to talk to.  Someone who is willing to invest time with you as you grow in your faith.  Then you will truly NEVER be alone.

If you already are a believer in Christ, review those verses I shared with you.  Renew your faith.  I would like for you to read Luke 15:11-32, the story of the prodigal son.  God always stands ready to wrap His arms around His children and shower us with love.  You are LOVED, and you are NEVER alone!

My heart hurts for you.  I hope that you will continue to seek Jesus.  God Bless you, and thank you for reaching out!  I would love to be here for you to talk to if you need to.  Simply email me at toddj@toddbecker.org
 


07/12/2017
Anonymous:

I feel like my life is ripping apart at the seems.. My life has never been easy for me and it just keeps getting worse and worse. I'm not as depressed as I was before, but I just feel so lost and alone in this world.. what do I do??
 


07/11/2017
tbfchris:
To Anonymous who just got done reading the "I Know" book:

That is so cool to here what God did and is doing in your life!  God wants to use you mightily for his kingdom.  In Matthew 9:35-38 Jesus says that the "harvest is plentiful but the workers are few."  God has plenty of work for you to do for His kingdom, you just need to surrender yourself to Him to do it.  God's will in your life should not to be confusing to you, it acutally says in 1 Corinthians 14:33 that "God is not a God of confusion, but of peace."  When you seek Him first, God will lead you to where He wants you to go.       

Regarding getting closer to the Lord, that should be what you strive for everyday.  That is how you will really know where and how God wants to use you.  Getting into God's word daily is #1!  However, there are some other things you could be doing as well.  Here are a few:

1. Learn to Worship God (with your life)
   --I am not talking about just singing in church or listening to worship music in the car.  Those are both good, however I am talking about worshiping God in every aspect of our life.    When you take communion at church are you just going through the motions, or are you truly thanking God for what He did for you?  When you drive down the road, do you thank him for the beauty you see around you.? Are you praising him in the morning for giving you another day?  I think you get the point.   Read Psalm 103: 1-5 and I think it will make a little more since to you.               

2. Get activly involved in a Gospel-preaching church
     --God did not design you to do your Christian walk alone.  You need people in your life within the church to help build and grow you to help you get closer to the Lord.  Joining a small group or Bible study will really help you get connected in.  Almost every church has one, you just need to ask.  Youth group is also really important.  There you can really develop relationships and get good opportunities to grow.  

3. Continually renew your mind
     --Continue to battle sin in your life and evaluate yourself on where your life is.  God is continuing to show us things to change in our lives.  Ephesians 4:23 says that we need to be continually renewing our mind.  

4. Root out garbage in your life
     --Philipians 4:8 says we should focus our minds on whatever is pure, holy.  When we listen to movies that have course language, sex, ect. it subconciously gets into our soul.  The same goes with music or video games.  Their is a term to remember that might help you with this: GIGO.  It stands for Garbage in/Garbage Out.  Keep the garbage out of your life and it won't spew out of you in your life.  

I hope this helps.  We are always here for you and if I can be of any more help please don't hesitate to e-mail me at 

chris@toddbecker.org
 


06/30/2017
Anonymous:

I have just finish the 'I know' book and I would like to be the kid out of my family that has changed for the better my biological sister has set a bad reputation for me I am fifteen years old and have started following what she does I have been driving away at my feelings for a long time I am not sure why I am here because I know that I shouldn't have a second chance I know that God brought me here because a while age you came to Eldorado high school in Kansas and I talk to one volunteer and a leader at my church that day. I want to be that difference in the world. That one kid that no one believed in. So I guess my question is how can I make that dream a reality? How can I get closer to God other than reading the bible every day?
 


06/30/2017
tbftodd:
To Anonymous who wants to start fresh with God:

First of all, I want to than the Lord for your heart to seek renewal and regeneration in the Lord!  It is a good thing to recognize our errors and turn back to God!  King David, the "man after God's own heart", made many mistakes but God granted him great favor--not because David was so perfect, but because he constantly sought forgiveness from God, and repented of his sin.  I am going to assume that you have a relationship with Christ already, because you say that you want to "start fresh".

And for you, that is the key.  In our relationship with Jesus, the first step is understanding that we are sinners--we make mistakes--and that we need to fix them.  Romans 3:23 reminds us that "For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of the glory of God." But God is faithful, and will wipe the slate clean for those who repent--those who admit their mistakes and who genuinely want to change. Ezekiel 22:19 says "And if a wicked person turns away from their wickedness and does what is just and right, they will live by doing so."  

So, how do you start fresh with God?  The first step is to confess your mistakes to God, and be completely honest with Him--and yourself.  1John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." God already knows your mistakes, but like a parent, He wants us to acknowledge that we need Him to cleanse us.

Next, find a strong Christian mentor--a Pastor, Elder, small group leader, family friend--whom you can trust, and confess to them as well.  Why?  Because as James 5:19 states "Therefore, confess your sins to each other, and pray for each other so you may be healed.  The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." You need people around you who know your struggles, who can pray for you, who can be there for you to help hold you up when you struggle.  Confessing can be painful, it can be intimidating.  But what I have found is that is is liberating and really joyful!  I have learned that I am not alone in my struggles--many things that I thought no one else would understand are shared by people I would have never expected!  Now, this doesn't mean we just tell everything to everyone who will listen, that would be foolish.  But try to find someone you trust, who you know will not hurt you.  And take your confession to the Lord in prayer with them.

Also, make sure that you are strongly connected to a group of believers.  Ecclesiastes 4:12 says "Though one may be overpowered, two may defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Going to church every Sunday is great, but make sure that you are being cared for--seek out relationships there that keep you connected.  

Lastly, read your Bible daily.  Intentionally--not just as something to do, but with the idea that God is going to talk to you through it.  Not only will He speak to you through it, reading His word daily makes it part of who you are.  As King David said in Psalm 119:11 "I have hidden your word in my heart, that I may not sin against you." By staying connected to His word, you will be less likely to make the same mistakes you have been, and it will help prevent other mistakes in the future.  

So, in conclusion, confess your sins to God, to a trusted mentor, stay connected to his body of believers, and read your Bible daily.  Those steps, I think, will lead you to a much closer relationship to God, and will help keep you anchored there.  God bless you in this journey, and if you ever need to talk, please feel free to email me at toddj@toddbecker.org

 


06/15/2017
Anonymous:

I wanna start fresh with the lord I've made plenty of mistakes in the past that I regret and I know I need to fix them how do I start fresh and become closer to god 

06/14/2017
tbftodd:
To Anonymous who is following in his dad's footsteps:

I love the fact that you are looking to make better life choices, and the fact that you are asking how to do that is the very first step!  

First and foremost, I want you to ask yourself what your relationship with Jesus Christ is.  Have you repented of your poor choices, admitted that you are a sinner, and are powerless to gain God's favor?  And then have you asked Jesus to be your one and only Savior, who can take away your sins?  Jesus said in John 3:5 "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God"  What Jesus means is that you must be born again in Him, made a new creation.

Once you are born again, as Paul says in 2 Corinthians 5:17 "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:  The old has gone, the new is here!"  How exciting is that! What that means in your situation is that you no longer have to follow the patterns of the past--you are FREE to forge ahead in your new life with Jesus.  

So, let's assume that you have done that, and that is why you want to start making new, better choices that lead to life instead of death.  How would I encourage you to do that? I would ask if you have a Bible?  Why is a Bible so important, you might ask?  Well, more than an operator's manual, as some churches like to describe it, the Bible is God's revelation to us, in which He describes Himself, and let's us know how He loves us.  It is the very foundation of our belief system.  2 Timothy 3:16 tells us "All scripture is God breathed and useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness."  So, without studying the Bible, you will never know who God really is, and you will not know what good choices look like through God's eyes.

So, studying the Word(Bible) is a very important step.  But another, and almost as important, is to find a good, Godly mentor.  Someone to help you understand the Scriptures, someone who has more life experience who can help you walk through the difficulties of life.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 says it this way: "9 Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity the one who falls and has no one to help them up...And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him.  A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart."

And probably the most important of all is to develop your prayer life.  This is your time to talk to God personally, in your own words, just as you would to your own father or friend.  He is both, you know.  He desires you to speak to Him, and even if you do not know what to say, the Holy Spirit will tell the Father the desires of your heart: Romans 8:26 tells us this: "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  We do not know what we out to pray for, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us through wordless groans."  Being silent and listening to what God wants to tell me has become one of my favorite times of my day!  

All of these work together, and none are as effective on their own...you need the Word in your heart so you know who God really is and who He is not; you need a mentor to help you stay on track so the Devil won't pick you off; and you need prayer to let God speak to you and refresh you.  

By 1. Accepting Christ as Lord and Savior, and 2. Starting with those three steps, you will be on your way to making better choices.  I will be praying for you, my friend, and I want you to know that you can always contact me here if you have more questions or need more help, at toddj@toddbecker.org 

 


05/19/2017
Anonymous:

I have followed my dads foot steps and same with my family but they all have made bad choices and died early in life like my uncle so I would like to know how do I stop following there choices and make better ones that will be better and help my family out in a good way not a bad way

05/17/2017
tbfjoana:
Dear anonymous who's boyfriend joined the navy,

I am so sorry for what your going through having a bumpy relationship with someone so close to you can be tough. But how much does your every day life revolve completely around your  boyfriend? And how is that relationship compared to your relationship with the Lord?  
 
I understand that as girls we try to see our worth and love from people around us . But as Philippians 3:8 say, EVERYTHING ELSE IS WORTHLESS when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ.

Is your relationship with your boyfriend pushing your relationship closer or away from the Lord. 

By relationship with the Lord I mean, is your every day focus on Him. Does he rule your life and do you count on Him on everything? Do you love Him more than anything else? I would like for you to inspect your life and see where you put Him in it.  Is he first or is he second under your boyfriend?

You see, " no one is righteous not even one" ( Romans 3:10) If you see that you truly don't have a relationship with the Lord and he is not the ruler of your life. I would like to show you how to change that, “I tell you the truth, those who listen to my message and believe in God who sent me have eternal life. They will never be condemned for their sins, but they have already passed from death into life." ( John 4:25)  You see we have to truly BELIEVE IN GOD. And declare he is Lord of your life and BELIEVE  he has risen (Romans 10:9) you will be saved. You see it is only believing and declaring Jesus is Lord of your life you can be saved. And by putting Him in first place everything else will fall into place. ( Matthew 6)
 
 Finally, I would like to say that if you put your relationship with the Lord first. And make Him ruler of your life. You will see that your worth and love does not come from the people around you but from the Lord. 

Thank you for contacting us and I really hope this helps you. Please if you have any questions or need to talk don't hesitate to email me at Joana@toddbecker.org


05/13/2017
tbfemilyd:
Dear anonymous trying to get over a break-up,

I know that it is hard to get over something that means a lot to you. For that, my heart goes out to you. However, your true worth, satisfaction, and hope does not come through having a boyfriend. IT can be said this way.

 “Yes, everything else is worthless compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ.” (Philippians 3:8)

You have to come to the point of realization that nothing matters except for knowing Christ Jesus as Lord. So I have to ask you, is Jesus your Lord? This means that He is the ruler of your life, He is the one that is in control and you abide in Him. When this is the case, nothing else matters and a boyfriend becomes less significant to you. So, if this is not the case for you, I want to tell you how it can be.

“If you openly declare that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” (Romans 10:9)

In conclusion, the only way that you can get over this break-up is if you make Jesus your Lord, because in comparison to knowing Him, everything else is worthless. But, most importantly, it is how you escape the danger of hell and have a hope to go to Heaven when you die.

Because of his grace he declared us righteous and gave us confidence that we will inherit eternal life.” (Titus 3:7)

Because of your sin, you are not righteous (perfect). “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.” (Romans 3:23). Because of your sin, you deserved to be put in hell “For the wages of sin is death,” (Romans 6:23). However, if you make Jesus your Lord and place your faith in Him you can be made right with God (righteous), because He died for you on the cross, paying for your sins.

“Christ suffered for our sins once for all time. He never sinned, but he died for sinners to bring you safely home to God. He suffered physical death, but he was raised to life in the Spirit.” (1 Peter 3:18)

“But the Scriptures declare that we are all prisoners of sin, so we receive God’s promise of freedom only by believing in Jesus Christ.” (Galatians 3:22)

I would love to hear what you think about this and if this helps at all, also if there is any more questions you may have. Please email me at

emilyd@toddbecker.org


05/12/2017
Anonymous:

My boyfriend is going in the navy and I'm worried it's going to break us, we've been fighting a lot also. What can I do to prevent that?

05/11/2017